i made a mistake

My brain is hanging upside down
I need something to slow me down

communication theory in the deep fried freezing weather

convenience, availability, and popularity of a communication modality is inversely correlated to importance, truthfulness, and earnestness of a communication content.

no time left but time for all

i am increasingly relying on google calendar. if not scheduled on my account, i will most likely forget whatever i have to do or go. recently i see more and more blue and less and less white space. i should start using different colours.

somehow (i do need but) i don't study hard enough at all for my classes. a few days ago, just walking through the library and bookstacks made me feel inhumane. but then it is an inevitable truth that i am much dumber now than two years ago.

just tonight, i forgot how long i have not listened to my music and how much i have missed them. so now, my pandora station sounds fresher, happier, and more nostalgic than ever. and i undoubtedly think of people and places.

i already missed a train and now i am trying not to miss that bus. my life is harsh nowadays and running away from me, just like three months ago, one year ago, and four and half years ago. but regardless how she treats me, this life is the source of my happiness.

immediate materialistic need

a working phone
a clean desk
a jacket

after 2 months, 1 hour and 11 minutes

i feel unquestionably lost, slightly angry inside, and disappointingly lifeless after talking to people who love me the most and whom i love the most. goddamnit.

omissions

i have no idea (but have a few clues), but about right now (or this weekend or this winter or next summer),
i want to leave everything (my heart isnt for) behind (with my dearest lovers and friends). (zen must be among all of us)

when the pandora starts repeating itself

i have no idea, but about right now,
i want to leave everything behind

Grinding Halt by The Cure

Everything's coming to a griding halt ---.

because we can't stop

think but dont think too deep
plan but dont plan too much
act but dont act too fast
explorer but dont explorer too far
vision but dont vision too big